[10.15.09]

24 great comments!

Politeness In Job Search. When To Say Thank You.

After writing the post Why Politeness May Be Hurting Your Job Search this week, a really great discussion got started regarding manners. And it is an interesting question about when and how to use the manners that have been “drummed in” to you since childhood (Thanks Sarah for the words “drummed in”!).

There is anxiety for some who would rather be safe than risk putting someone off or appearing to be bold or inappropriate. I get that. Job search is a time where you are looking to make no mistakes. It is a competitive market out there and you do not want to stand out in a bad way.

But you also don’t want to be stuck in the past. And you don’t want to act one way on Twitter and in another way when addressing a cover letter.

So, when to say thank you. Here’s my thinking:

In Thank You Notes?

Hold on, now. Not so obvious. It depends on a few things. Who is the recipient? What was the nature of your conversation? I saw a good post on this by Brad Remillard who writes Career Blog and is an well-known executive recruiter here in Orange County. In his post “The Real Reason For “Thank You” Letters Isn’t To Say, “Thank You” Brad suggests that the better use of a thank you note is “to reinforce your ability to do the job and/or address any potential issues that came up during the
interview”. I agree with that although I wonder whether a note arriving a few days after the interview will be too late? As a hiring manager has my impression already been firmed up?

The question is: should a follow-up or thank you note include a “thank you” at all? Based on the premise laid out in my post from earlier this week, can a “thank you” hurt you? Hard to imagine, I guess, but a heavy thank you can feel over the top or desperate.

THE MAIN POINT: You were not interviewed as a favor to you. They weren’t throwing you a bone. You were interviewed to potentially solve a business problem for the company. And you were identified as a possible solution.

And while I’m not suggesting “don’t say thank you” after an interview, I honestly don’t think it is necessary. I like a further point Brad makes that a follow-up note should be more of a furthering of your marketing effort. That makes sense. And seems a better purpose in writing a follow-up note.

And, by the way, my position changes for follow-up notes after an informational interview. That absolutely deserves a “thank you”.

What do you think?

In Networking

Even when networking is done right – when there is a good “give and take”, a thank you is always appropriate and much appreciated! And I don’t much care if it is an e-mail, a text message, a hand written note, a $5 Starbucks gift card or a re-tweet of a post you liked. I sincerely appreciate a thank you. As does anyone who has taken time out of their busy life to help. It nicely closes the loop on a networking interaction.

Some examples:

A recruiter who gives you 15 minutes of their time when they don’t have a match for you.
A fellow networker in transition who helps you get your feet wet on your own search.
An employed person who shows up at networking events to give back.
Anyone who forwards you a targeted job lead.
A speaker at an event you attend.

All these deserve a thank you. Don’t you think?

It doesn’t have to be long. A few lines work well! But it should be sincere. Authentic. And, if you’d like, you can ask how you might be able to return the favor. That opens a new loop for networking . . .

Curious to get your take on this point.

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Ilan Justh

I always start of my thank you with something like thanks for taking time in you busy day to speak with me and then jump into the marketing spiel. I make it 4 or 5 MAX paragraphs. Did something in the meeting leave doubt. CLEAR IT UP HERE. Did you forget to mention a clincher – something pertinent or a homerun statement? Make it here. At a recent interview the person on the other side mentioned a goal he wants to accomplish. Tell him how you can help him do JUST THAT. Did you find a nugget the next morning you can add to your side of the ledger? Bring it up.
Ilan Justh

I always start of my thank you with something like thanks for taking time in you busy day to speak with me and then jump into the marketing spiel. I make it 4 or 5 MAX paragraphs. Did something in the meeting leave doubt. CLEAR IT UP HERE. Did you forget to mention a clincher – something pertinent or a homerun statement? Make it here. At a recent interview the person on the other side mentioned a goal he wants to accomplish. Tell him how you can help him do JUST THAT. Did you find a nugget the next morning you can add to your side of the ledger? Bring it up.
Jay Heinrich

In the two circumstances indicated I would say the “thank you” for an interview would include a “thanks for your interest in my background, how I might help your firm and your time”. If someone has “given you something (IE. recruiters time when you are not a match) then I would say a true “thank you” note would be applicable and appropriate.
After an interview your “marketing” f/u message is fine but I personally think it doesn’t hurt to say “thanks” for other things. You leave the impression of a person who is appreciative.
Jay Heinrich

In the two circumstances indicated I would say the “thank you” for an interview would include a “thanks for your interest in my background, how I might help your firm and your time”. If someone has “given you something (IE. recruiters time when you are not a match) then I would say a true “thank you” note would be applicable and appropriate.
After an interview your “marketing” f/u message is fine but I personally think it doesn’t hurt to say “thanks” for other things. You leave the impression of a person who is appreciative.
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hey Jay – I like the word “appreciative” and that is exactly the sentiment that makes sense in the situation you describe. It recognizes the opportunity you’ve been offered based on your qualifications for the job. Thanks . . .
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hi Ilan – All good uses for a follow-up note. Thanks for adding those thoughts!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hey Jay – I like the word “appreciative” and that is exactly the sentiment that makes sense in the situation you describe. It recognizes the opportunity you’ve been offered based on your qualifications for the job. Thanks . . .
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hi Ilan – All good uses for a follow-up note. Thanks for adding those thoughts!
Linda

I think it’s important to do a thank you e-mail or note to the interviews that one is interested in.
I’ve always believed that thank you notes show a prospective employer one’s professionalism & follow-through. I’m not saying one has to do a thank you note for every single interview, but it’s important to be selective.
Many years ago, (in the good old days of lots of jobs to choose from!), I was told, that I was chosen for a position at a local architectural firm because I was the only one that sent a thank you note. I still believe that is true in today’s challenging times, dependent on one’s interest in the job, etc.
Thanks for the opportunity to share one’s opinions, Tim, & the professionalism of your suggestions/tips!
Linda

I think it’s important to do a thank you e-mail or note to the interviews that one is interested in.
I’ve always believed that thank you notes show a prospective employer one’s professionalism & follow-through. I’m not saying one has to do a thank you note for every single interview, but it’s important to be selective.
Many years ago, (in the good old days of lots of jobs to choose from!), I was told, that I was chosen for a position at a local architectural firm because I was the only one that sent a thank you note. I still believe that is true in today’s challenging times, dependent on one’s interest in the job, etc.
Thanks for the opportunity to share one’s opinions, Tim, & the professionalism of your suggestions/tips!
Susan Platt

I would like opinions on e-mailed thank yous. In the “old world”, a nice note card would be great. In the current world, with so many working from home or traveling frequently or working on contract in a temporary office space, e-mail seems the only way to go. Is e-mail frowned upon in any way?
Susan Platt

I would like opinions on e-mailed thank yous. In the “old world”, a nice note card would be great. In the current world, with so many working from home or traveling frequently or working on contract in a temporary office space, e-mail seems the only way to go. Is e-mail frowned upon in any way?
Tatiana

I am doing the same thing, except I try to keep my thank you notes to 3 paragraphs. I use bullets for my marketing spiel to make it easier to read.
Tatiana

I am doing the same thing, except I try to keep my thank you notes to 3 paragraphs. I use bullets for my marketing spiel to make it easier to read.
http://www.linkedin.com/in/melindaasimmons melinda simmons

I agree with all that is said here except for Brad Remillard’s admonition against using e-mail as the medium for sending a follow-up note. In all of my interactions with high-level executives during my job search virtually all communication was handled via e-mail, and that is what I used for my follow-up communication as well. I prefer the immediacy of e-mail and believe in today’s world the recipients do too. In fact, I read another blog that stated that if you used snail mail for thank you notes you looked hopelessly old-fashioned! Just another example of how you have to take all of the wonderful advice available and tailor it to what feels right for you.
- Melinda Simmons
http://www.linkedin.com/in/melindaasimmons melinda simmons

I agree with all that is said here except for Brad Remillard’s admonition against using e-mail as the medium for sending a follow-up note. In all of my interactions with high-level executives during my job search virtually all communication was handled via e-mail, and that is what I used for my follow-up communication as well. I prefer the immediacy of e-mail and believe in today’s world the recipients do too. In fact, I read another blog that stated that if you used snail mail for thank you notes you looked hopelessly old-fashioned! Just another example of how you have to take all of the wonderful advice available and tailor it to what feels right for you.
- Melinda Simmons
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

@Linda – thanks for sharing your experience. And, yes, I agree that a strong follow-up can be a decision maker in a tight race. The key, I think, is in writing a strong confident note. One that reinforces your positioning statement and accomplishments.
@Susan – I think e-mail is fine. Some even swear by a text message to the right person! While a handwritten note still plays well with some (the fact that you took the time), it is not a game changer. For me, a well written and confident e-mail does the trick. What did you learn during the interview that might help you make this decision?
@Melinda – There IS a lot of advice out there. You are right to take it all in, filter out what doesn’t work for you and forge ahead with confidence!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

@Linda – thanks for sharing your experience. And, yes, I agree that a strong follow-up can be a decision maker in a tight race. The key, I think, is in writing a strong confident note. One that reinforces your positioning statement and accomplishments.
@Susan – I think e-mail is fine. Some even swear by a text message to the right person! While a handwritten note still plays well with some (the fact that you took the time), it is not a game changer. For me, a well written and confident e-mail does the trick. What did you learn during the interview that might help you make this decision?
@Melinda – There IS a lot of advice out there. You are right to take it all in, filter out what doesn’t work for you and forge ahead with confidence!
http://profile.typepad.com/suzyubry Suzy Ubry

Another post to share re: when to send the thank you note … for those times that you sense it is appropriate to send a written one. Personally, I found it very helpful to questions that I had about when to send.
@leaddawg
“Thank You Strategy for Your Next Interview”
http://bit.ly/M6tkb
http://profile.typepad.com/suzyubry Suzy Ubry

Another post to share re: when to send the thank you note … for those times that you sense it is appropriate to send a written one. Personally, I found it very helpful to questions that I had about when to send.
@leaddawg
“Thank You Strategy for Your Next Interview”
http://bit.ly/M6tkb
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Good one, Suzy. Thanks!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Good one, Suzy. Thanks!
Pingback: Thank You Notes: Sending The Right Message | Career Management Alliance Blog
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Politeness In Job Search. When To Say Thank You.

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