[05.18.09]

12 great comments!

Job Search Strategy For Couples

Job search is full of ups and downs. If you are the job seeker, pressures abound due to the unique emotions and specific knowledge that you carry quietly in your head as the days roll past. It is up to you to bring this stage of life to an end, right? It sticks to you.

But most of you are not alone in life or in this challenge. Some of you are probably acting that way. And it’s not working.

This particular post is being pushed along by two events:

First, I decided to build a presentation topic around job search for couples. The idea being that job seekers are not alone in the effort and should not act as if they are flying solo.

Second, I have a unique opportunity tomorrow (actually today since it is now 1:02 AM). I am having lunch with a couple. Husband and wife. Both out of work. Now normally I would say that this was a unique situation. In this economy, perhaps not.

So the premise is that whether husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend or otherwise connected, there is no such thing as a solo ride. The partner experiences all the ups and downs that you do. But from the passenger seat. And if you’ve ever been in the shotgun seat, you’ll know that the ride can be scarier when your hands aren’t on the wheel.

Below I will share the presentation outline with a few ideas under each and I’d like to ask your help. Whether you are the job seeker, the one connected to the job seeker or the one connected (and also looking), would you tell me your thoughts?

What else should I cover? Do you like the idea of going to a presentation or seminar where your partner is there with you? A chance to share this journey from the start? Comment below and let me know!

1. The Psychology of Job Search

Job search elicits a number of reactions in a marriage or partnership. They include: “This is my mess and I will get us through this!”, “I’m worried, do we have enough savings?”, “What do we tell our friends?”, “Where do I start and how?” Early on in a job search there is a significant need for communication between partners. To balance out the emotions and to set realistic expectations (emotional and financial), couples have to manage their psychology and stay confident. This section helps couples manage their expectations and mental approach during job search.

2. Financial Planning – Managing Expenses During Job Search

Unlike in most marriages where one partner owns the family finances, during job search this must be a shared responsibility. Minimally, there needs to be a kickoff discussion followed by monthly follow-ups to maintain an understanding of “how we’re doing”. If the family includes children, they should be included as well. To set expectations – especially if a new, tight budget is required to keep a balanced budget. Sacrifices may need to be made and understood by all. This section helps families plan for and implement a new budget during an extended job search.

3. Networking – A Family Affair

Historically a role of the job seeker alone, the new social media culture has kicked open a new door such that the partner and the children (tween and teen) can play a significant role in supporting the family job seeker. Think MySpace, FaceBook. Think PTA and Little League. Think friends and extended family. Everyone can be educated regarding the job objectives of Mom or Dad. Really. This section illustrates the many ways families can play a critical role in helping a job seeker network.

4. Communication – Constant Contact

Ever leave a job interview and spend an hour writing reactions and ideas in a spiral notebook? Then you come home to dinner and get asked “How did it go?” Your answer: ”Pretty good. We’ll see.” What if the spiral notebook was replaced with a family meeting and strategy session? Imagine the feeling of involvement from your family at the end of that meeting. And picture their engagement in wanting to help with new ideas. This section shows how communication during job search provides an important security during job search.

5. Re-kindling – The Family Bond

While job search places a burden on the family it also presents a huge opportunity. A chance to find a new spark, to seek out new experiences and actively enjoy significant time together. If a husband or wife traditionally commutes at least an hour each way and is now home for many mornings and evenings, what could be done with that time? In what may be the only extended break of a career, what will you do with the opportunity? This section outlines all the ways that couples or families can re-connect during a job search.

So, those are the five sections. Think of a one hour presentation or a two hour seminar including five breakout sessions (20 minutes each).

Both would be free. Would you go?

Do you like the idea of building and sharing your job search strategy with your spouse?

Like this topic? Below are a few related posts that you may find interesting . . .

When You Are The Sole Breadwinner

Job Search – What A Spouse Needs To Know

Job Search – Avoiding A Personal Bailout

Madeleine Wiener de Torsiac

Hey Tim!
I would include in your coaching, making sure that each member of the couple makes the time to do something fun (or de-stressing) on his/her own so that the conversation doesn’t revolve only around job hunting and so that you don’t drive each other crazy. By the way, we enjoyed the lunch and being part of this exciting project! Good luck! Madeleine
Madeleine Wiener de Torsiac

Hey Tim!
I would include in your coaching, making sure that each member of the couple makes the time to do something fun (or de-stressing) on his/her own so that the conversation doesn’t revolve only around job hunting and so that you don’t drive each other crazy. By the way, we enjoyed the lunch and being part of this exciting project! Good luck! Madeleine
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Thanks Madeleine – I had a great time at lunch today! You guys provided some great ideas on this topic. Thank you!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Thanks Madeleine – I had a great time at lunch today! You guys provided some great ideas on this topic. Thank you!
http://profile.typepad.com/6p0115709607f9970b Roberta G

Hi Tim,
I would add to what Madeleine said about the de-stressing part. Not only adding fun activities, but understanding what you can do to lower your stress levels and take care of yourself during this time. For example – exercise, time with friends separately (especially if you are both home all day), joint projects. And places that you can go that are inexpensive and fun – doesn’t always have to be dinner out. Taking a walk together, writing your own version of “My Town” on $5 a day. You get the idea.
Best of luck – a wonderful idea.
http://profile.typepad.com/6p0115709607f9970b Roberta G

Hi Tim,
I would add to what Madeleine said about the de-stressing part. Not only adding fun activities, but understanding what you can do to lower your stress levels and take care of yourself during this time. For example – exercise, time with friends separately (especially if you are both home all day), joint projects. And places that you can go that are inexpensive and fun – doesn’t always have to be dinner out. Taking a walk together, writing your own version of “My Town” on $5 a day. You get the idea.
Best of luck – a wonderful idea.
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Great examples, Roberta. Thanks!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Great examples, Roberta. Thanks!
Dave Rose

This has been a recurring discussion I have had with many of my partners in networking meetings. Almost universally, I see spouses and older children eager to help in any way they can. Just like at your last job, involving your team members increases their engagement in the team’s objectives. Some team members need to be directed, some need to be unleashed, and some need recognition for their wonderfully supportive nature. Your family members have those same needs and their willingness to go the extra mile will help the job seeker achieve their goals.
I have found that my 15 year old son is learning about many things that I might not have shared with him as an employee. He is interested in the “how” of networking, presentations, company research, and writing cover letters. He and I have worked together on many aspects of this job search and it has created some special moments that are now part of the family history.
Great topic!
Dave Rose

This has been a recurring discussion I have had with many of my partners in networking meetings. Almost universally, I see spouses and older children eager to help in any way they can. Just like at your last job, involving your team members increases their engagement in the team’s objectives. Some team members need to be directed, some need to be unleashed, and some need recognition for their wonderfully supportive nature. Your family members have those same needs and their willingness to go the extra mile will help the job seeker achieve their goals.
I have found that my 15 year old son is learning about many things that I might not have shared with him as an employee. He is interested in the “how” of networking, presentations, company research, and writing cover letters. He and I have worked together on many aspects of this job search and it has created some special moments that are now part of the family history.
Great topic!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hi Dave – Thanks for your story. A great example of involving your family! I’ve found there are those around you in job search who are uniquely interested in your success. These are often the first and most important networking partners. Appreciate your contribution!
http://profile.typepad.com/1220292248s14607 Tim Tyrell-Smith

Hi Dave – Thanks for your story. A great example of involving your family! I’ve found there are those around you in job search who are uniquely interested in your success. These are often the first and most important networking partners. Appreciate your contribution!

Job Search Strategy For Couples

New: Job Search Strategy Software Coming Soon!

Sign Up For The Newsletter

Order New Business Cards

Your Favorite Posts

Buy A Book From Tim

Read A Recent Post

Find A Topic You Like

Watch A Free Webinar By Tim

Get Marketing Help

Find A Resume Pro or Coach

Join Me On Facebook

Know Your Objectives

Search For Job Leads!

Watch Me Speak

Marketing Resources